Crazy Times

I have been trying to figure out why this blog has got no loving from me lately. My mind feels like mush. I'm hyperextended in the area of raising kids and working and helping Will. My dreams and hopes seem to be muffled in the middle of it all right now. I haven't exercised in months and the thought of getting out on a run stresses me out to figure out all of the logisitics-- which one of my kids is sleeping and who needs to be fed and is Will hungry. Somedays I feel like I'm losing myself to be able to find the rest of the world. And I know losing yourself for other people can be good- but not taking care of oneself is bad too. I guess I don't know where the line is. And I know this post is getting off on some mommy woes tangent- but I think or I assume everyone faces this challenge in one way or another.

We don't take time to do the things that are important - to recharge the batteries. We work half baked sometimes and we're starting off on the wrong foot. I think we need to approach our days like we would training for a triathlon. Don't start out too fast- because you have to work up to where you need to be, but do start training. No matter how slow the progress- sharpen the saw. Say one more prayer today that you might not have. Take a walk, read your scriptures for five extra minutes. Take two more minutes to look at the sunset. Turn off the radio. Shut down facebook. Whatever it takes muffling isn't going to cut it. 

As for Will and I - I realized the other day I'm just so in love with him. We had the Mormon Channel interview us about our experince with his stroke-- and how we have made it through it all. I found myself just telling them how lucky I am to be with him. How happy I am that he survived. Seven years later - and with the trials still pouring in-- The bad isn't what stands out. His hundreds of job resumes without response, my plowing through the wee hours in the morning to get my work projects done. None of that really stands out at the end. What stands out is us. I love this man more than ever. I am so grateful for his hard work. He has never given up . He still sends out resumes and we're enrolled in another set of classes to get him some medical coding certificates. I am so proud of him. Someday he'll find his job, but in the meantime, we have each other and that is all that matters.

Keep with us on our journey all!

Summer